Feeling like I’m connected to a feeling deeper than living,
Afraid of a possibility I’m the only one that feels it,
Caught up in the rapture of love when I think of her,
FaceTimed caught me off guard but it still wasn’t you,
I don’t care who it is, cause I come home to you,
I will still say out loud that you bae, I know good and damn well in yo head you call me boo,
I’ll talk to you about feelings but not too often, just to know if it’s true,
I wouldn’t want to be anywhere with anyone else, I just want you.
I hope that you don’t take it the wrong way, but I enjoy declining h*es for you.
I don’t care what they could say, it won’t change the plans I got for you.
Nothing can change what I imagine to the world what we could do.
Blazing new paths most to many have never seen before,
Stay by my side I’ll show you a side of the world that could hold to your heart a true reward,
Cause baby I’m the catch and you got it all, I’m talking family and more in store because I know deep down inside there’s even more of you and there’s way more to me that we both could explore…
Why do I feel that it’s up to me to prove that I care, when clearly the person I’m trying to show that I care obviously could care less?
I’m not the type to just give up on a person but I see that it’s easy for most people to give up on me.
You can’t appeal to everyone, I understand this, but I’m only trying to appeal to those in my immediate life. Friends stiff arm me, family does the same but that comes and goes, and mainly anyone woman I have an interest in, is only temporarily interested in me.
Sometimes I wonder if I chose to be an asshole, chose to go with my second mind, come off stand-offish and a loner who only wants to be touched if it’s sexually, I wonder if my life would be easier because it seems as if life gets easier the more you care less. As if not being genuine is truly the way to be because as much as I try to be genuine with anyone I choose to be around, it’s seems useless because I ultimately always become a mat to be stepped on.
Times are definitely mutating. Mutations and alterations of what I once thought was the path. The path is the same but the road, evolved in front of my face. I know I’ve grown and became more into my own, but I wasn’t prepared to see my view of a relationship change.
evening of edits.
So as I sit here realizing scheduling free thought time for my site isn’t all that simple w/ me. I’m more stimulated by random occurrences that spark me to critically ponder on the subject. Its always by something random. I guess in this case, its my will to write. This section of my site really is for me to build patience for script writing or for any other form of writing. This one is slightly forced, I will admit that however, I like what my mind is forming. Its forming bridges to other ideas. Furthermore, before I think myself into a deeper bland hole, I will nip this short and get back to these edits.
#GoodEvening this is the #loneeno #signingOff